escape

I may not be posting for a while here--simply because I am not heading home tomorrow right after school and yes, I'll be sneaking out just to attend another Rose FGD at the LUG offices. I will be most probably be grounded after that, so I'll be saying bye for the moment just in case that happens. Hey, I've missed out on 2 events already, and I'm not missing this one out, and being grounded will be worth it.

balara

It was a 1 hour trek through a place that no one would have thought existed in the heart of Quezon City. We (that's me and Mark) went past Mang Jimmy's (Mark: Gwapo kaya si Mang Jimmy?) to the Windmill and the old Balara Tower (which was closed), then to the park beside it (which was pretty dilapidated, but maintained a sense of charm all its own; Me: Parang pamilyar ito ah *points to old one-room building*...diba may nag-shooting ng MTV dito dati?) then to an old stone globe and an old jar, a monument to those who built the reservoirs (Unknown I unto all but not unto God and my colleagues; how true, who remembers the men who built Balara now), the crystal-clear yet surprisingly empty swimming pool, and until the residential areas. Then we turned back--we were afraid to get lost in the residential areas--and bumped into Maritoni on the way back (she was at Mang Jimmy's).

We parted ways at the back of Vinzon's; and since there were no Katipunan jeeps (it was lunchtime and everyone must be on break), I walked until the row of computer stores in Katipunan. There I bought (finally) a longer LAN cable; then went to Ali Mall to have lunch at KFC. I passed by National Bookstore too, looking for Kiko Machine 2, but ended up buying Le Guin's 1st book from the Earthsea Cycle since Kiko Machine 2 was out of stock.

I suppose I'm going back to reading again.

windmills

The video upload's taking forever and because of that I've started on my MP10 story without even having gone to the Balara Windmills yet. It's temporarily titled "Prinsesa Naranghita", simply because it was the first thing that came to mind. It's starting to sound Quixotic, with a high-heeled middle-aged woman (the Prinsesa Naranghita) literally following her dreams and accompanied by her trusted maid, Inday, and her loyal driver, Mang Jhun. I've only started with a few snippets, and I'd probably finish the draft later after our hiking trip. To the windmills then.

Although now, I'm starting to doubt the choice of name. Maybe I'll think of something else during the trip.

skinned

As you might've noticed (if you didn't then what the heck) I've got a new skin for my blog courtesy of Gecko+Fly. I guess I got tired of pink, and since I can't get the template that I originally downloaded, I got this one instead. It runs on the old blogger though, so no more drag-and-drop layouts and hello html again. Not that I'm complaining--the old blogger is way easier to customize even without that drag-and-drop.


Then there's an FGD again for Thursday--I'm not sure if I'm attending, I'll still have to check my sked and my mood--and a hiking trip to Mang Jimmy's tomorrow. And Gmail's acting weird again; I can't send the Pan Pil presentation for some reason. Oh well, maybe tomorrow it'll be acting fine again.

EDIT: Before I forget--I'm now a Cat Blogger. @_@

hausaufgaben

So just a short post before going back to work again, this time on that Pan Pil report (finally). Bio did not down as well as expected--I shouldn't have studied anymore for that--and Deustch was okay, though viele Panik set in and I pretty much ended up just reading my report; then again, I wrote that, so it shouldn't be much of a worry. So the only thing that needs to be done is that Pan Pil thing and a trip to the places past Mang Jimmy's for a story. Hopefully it'll all be over soon.

last chaos and a wii

Because of that Win that Wii Valentines contest on OnRPG.com, I discovered this (well, not really) new game--Last Chaos. After a pretty lengthy download (407mb and took around 5 hours), I started playing, and it was well worth the wait. Even though the lone server was laggy, owing in part to the "recommended" server weekend with special stat boosting drops, it was a very good game. With graphics reminiscent of RF and control systems similar to Rose, also with a Energy/Herb Harvesting system similar to that of Flyff, it's really engrossing even if levelling is quite slow (only got to lvl6 for the few hours that I played, even with those exp boosts I have picked up and their current highest lvl at 46).

I chose a Mage for my starting character, and it was okay for solo levelling. It remains to be seen if it's good for partying, will probably test that out in the coming days. It's not so newbie friendly, though--there are a lot of newbie quests, one for almost every level, but it doesn't really clarify why you need herbs, or what in the world is energy for. Drops were good, too--got a couple of Pan Flutes which was to be used for taming horses and could easily fetch thousands on the market ($_$). Yes, there are pets, and they are supposed to help out (haven't finished the Pan Flute's quest yet for my horse, but I do want a Dragon instead, too bad haven't found a Drake Egg yet).

Community? That remains to be seen, though. Of course nothing will replace all my pRose friends (from Pola to Tala), but if ever we leave to other games, I'll be going here.

Did I mention that it's free?

Now, even if I didn't win that Wii, it's well worth it.

nada-ness

Nobody was online on Tala earlier, and since I can't pause this download, I can't go online yet. Nobody's online on YM too, with me meeting Ami at Gateway earlier (just to give Pau's drawing/bday gift and no, those are food for the gods bars not yema)--he was on the way to watch OnL with Pau's family. Took some explaining, too, for mom, and somehow for the love of god I was allowed to go out. I'm actually supposed to be studying right now, but heck, I'm not in the mood. It's hard to study when not really in the mood--nothing is learned, anyway. Good luck to me.

heiligenschein

Apparently heiligenscheins are not the Northern Lights and are actually a play of light on dew-covered grasses which cause the backlit silhouette of the person to have a halo. I had picked that word out of the box yesterday, and so I have to report on in this Thursday, which increases my workload again. We haven't gotten anywhere with that Pan Pil report, which I'm also looking for a template (or the worst case scenario, make one). Well I haven't received what I needed to receive from them anyway. And we haven't started that docu, too. If nothing happens on Monday, well, there goes. I'll be checking on Tala later, too--hopefully he's online.

random sampling

An empty fear creeps over and swallows me unwillingly on the pyre. Even between quick instant chats like noodles and synthetic friendships I can't seem to blink and find that elusive rainbow and pot of gold and those happily ever afters that stories talk about. Nothing seems sure not even god(s) existence and the universe. So whatever happens I am nowhere while choreographed deaths play--flash across the screen.

rambling

And my still-fleeting thoughts flicker around a non-existent lamplight. I wait for what? I wait for questions to answers which just lie around scattered in an ocean of debris. Why, do you ask, why seek questions when you have answers? Well life seems not worth living without any questions waiting to be answered. And I seem to be near that point.

But I still have a sliver of a query to be answered, yet I hesitate to ask. Sitting here silent seems the best recourse for now.

extremities

So I am again on a pretty odd series of moodswings. Pretty depressed, good mood, depressed, then good mood again. He says it's just the lack of oxygen--trust scientists to come up with clinical explanations for everything from magic to moodswings. And then comes a screenie saying that my account's deleted but it was okay, which really doesn't add anything, except that apathy is coming again.

eyeball

It was like nothing happened last night until the wee hours of this morning. I guess I (or probably even we, to some extent) am just tired of all these negative vibes. And earlier, for an instant, everything seemed alright, from the game to the community. Plans are made again, like those before, but somehow, you know that it won't be the same and it won't be all right unlike the endings of good movies where the nice guy always wins. Who is the nice guy now, anyway?

If only it was so easy. So easy, yet so hard to leave.

Memories bind me to a damned system. I cling on to the last shred of hope, reliving only memories. Clinging to a hope that memories will soon be the present. Even though that little voice tells me it's time to move on; I can't.

And it just so mirrors what we are as a society today. We don't give a damn anymore, and if we do even a bit, it just dies down. Besides, everybody seems so wrong nowadays and nothing is right. Not even me. We're only human, after all, and as an old clanmate once said, everybody is wrong in the course of an argument.

And they say it's just a game. Well, it was once was just a game, then it bloomed into one of the best things that there was to be in the local gaming scene, then it's slowly being winded down to being just another crappy game again.

I can't wait for LOTRO. It'll be a nice dose of morphine from all these.

martial law

http://roseboards.levelupgames.ph/index.php?showtopic=5516

Now that comes up and you seriously doubt that good exists in this world.

But it only takes a few sparks to ignite a revolution. Maybe this is the last violent spark that everyone's been waiting for.

Whoever that idiot was, well, karma will take care of him. If karma doesn't, then we will.

mutterings

On the heels of another drunkard story and videoke machines I find myself keeling at the sight of an overview. Nothing ends, not even the random musings of a confessed stalker and the flickering lights of a piano bar. There, you watch a chartreux cat walking across a moonlit neon floor and singing a painful mew; but she does not mind you, she won't care even if you stare at her for all eternity. She only demands your payment for temporary release. The last song plays on, but the people never and would not want to leave. After all, their escape is through only a small peep-hole from which you could only pay-per-view.

candy houses

It's a little past 12am and still I'm not asleep. The candy house that my mom and my aunt made for my bday (which was yesterday) is now shrouded by several sheets of table napkins while the dog ate something from the floor again. It didn't really feel like a birthday--I can't seem to get back that feeling that little kids have when approaching their birthdays when they would grin from ear to ear and basically have fun. But to me, it's just like an ordinary day. I can't wait for tomorrow though--I'm getting my ears pierced and a ukay-ukay shopping spree. Hopefully I'll find a nice pair of boots.

chat

Tala, YM, and boards open, I chat away my time even if there's an exam tomorrow. I can't seem to review anyway; there's nothing to do except re-read the old handouts, and you don't learn a language from just reading. There's the need for practice too.

And I am so tired of this whole charade. It's again all meaningless to me. Am I not just an empty shell now, breathing just for a tomorrow that just turns out the same anyway. Then rinse and repeat.

god, inc. episode 4

I feel sorry for that guy in charge of Islam in Public Relations. Enjoy anyway.

ennui

I'm nowhere near completing anything today, and I'm a bit bored, so here I am again trying to write something which will probably mean nothing the next day. I still hadn't signed up for any of the ACLE, which was required for the class that I'd miss, and will just probably sign up on Thursday morning (hopefully they still have some slots at that European martial arts thing by UP Euro). I would probably start on that German Hausaufgaben already--just to get something over and done with. My Soc Sci peer group dynamics thing isn't going anywhere--which probably means I shouldn't be an anthropologist.

Enough, I'm tired of all this.

duel

We start the duel
Sitting across a linen-covered table
Under the flickering candlelight.

Not the best place to do battle.

You draw first,
A barrage of
You, her, me
While I dodge, parry,
I, you, she.

And I know we are both experienced players
At this game with unwritten rules
Yet everytime we play
Nothing follows--play by ear.

As expected
With the silence and only the rythmic clinks
Of silverware
It ends.

Stalemate.

hope

I recently read this on a friend's blog, and I must say, it's pretty pathetic. 50 reasons to hate the Philippines? Well, I could give you 50 reasons to hate other countries. And 50 reasons to love the Philippines more.

Firstly, there is no such thing as a perfect country.

Looters? Remember Hurricane Katrina. That was far far worse. The police was shooting everyone who they thought was a looter, even innocent civilians.

Heroes? Some schoolkids in America don't even know that other countries exist outside of theirs, and if they do, they don't even give a damn.

Cheap fame? Come to think of it, where is William Hung now?

Corruption? Well, in other countries, corruption exists. It's only much more hidden than here.

More funds for war? Look at Iraq. At least this little Third World country had the balls to withdraw; knowing the importance of one human life. The death toll's now at around 3,000 US troops, more than those who died in 9/11. And that's excluding Afganistan.

And with adding those 8, we've screwed up each other more, didn't we? We may rant about the problem, but that doesn't change anything.

Action is needed. And not necessarily out in the streets: we need to start from within ourselves. Like simply following the goddamn law, whoever the president is. Those little actionos amount much in the long run.And take a look at the GK Villages--the best success story in decades.

There is hope for us, still.

/die

While my period's getting the better of me and playing anything seems immaterial, I'll then write. I've completed a couple of quests and discovered the /die feature, which automatically kills your chara and sends it to the Planeshift Underworld and from which I had to figure a way out. I expect to see more of that Underworld in the future.


Anyway, just seen the Death Note trailer, looks nice, and got myself a widget from the An Inconvenient Truth webpage (which I still have to make a reaction paper on and makes you think that America would be really great again had Gore been at the helm). It's also nice to see that our house is considered pretty environmentally friendly: we don't have airconditioning, we don't have a car, we have energy-efficient bulbs, we don't have a dryer, we recycle some stuffs, and at least our rice is organic. Living simply has its perks, at least for the planet, and it shows that here in this little third-world archipelago, some things that are considered waste in those so-clled first world countries reused and recycled. Probably because people see that recycling is cheaper; just look at all those gin bottles resurrected as patis bottles. That's probably my advocacy for now.

EDIT:
Go and watch God, Inc. too on YouTube. Episode 3 out of 6 is currently playing, I'll go post them later.

lan card

So I'm finally back online on my laptop through a LAN card that I installed myself. *wide grin* If only ComSci had little math I surely would've gotten that course. So the only problem that's left is to look for a cable long enough so that I can have net access back in my room. Tala's done patching, but since there are no new real updates (well, bug fixes count) I'll probably play later and play a bit of Planeshift.

Planeshift is a so-called indie MMORPG: it's not produced by a major company, just a few people--with a very strong emphasis on the RP. The gameplay is unique, too: there are no predefined classes, only races that have almost all skills available to them. The NPCs are also unique: you literally talk to the NPC thru the chatbox, and what you say can trigger a quest, or something. The community is great, too--they really roleplay in-game, which is a refreshing change from all other MMOGs.

It's in alpha phase, though, so it's nowhere near to completion. Only a few classes have available 3d models; and the sole server is also a bit laggy. But that's to be expected from a game that's version .03, and even at .03 it's already intruiging, so if it gets to ver1, that would be nice.

desktop

The saying "The more you have, the more you need" rings so true. We had broadband installed yesterday after mom got fed up from hearing missed call complaints and disconnected everytime calls. The problem, though, is that the desktop has only one LAN port, and so I need to buy myself a router just to get net access for the laptop. Which means another 5k, and which also means I'll have to save again.

Yesterday I rediscovered LOTRO or Lord of the Rings Online. It's been ages since I last checked up on it, and at least now there's a game we can really play. It's already in closed beta in Europe and America, so that means open beta will follow soon, and if open beta comes, I'll surely join. I've signed up for their forums already, and yes, I did miss Middle-Earth. I'll either be a Elven Champion (again), Minstrel, or Lore-master.

LOTRO! Can't wait. :D

feigned insomnia

I am currently sleepy yet not asleep. One part of me refuses to sleep, waiting for something that I know not, while another screams for rest. That's why I am flipping thru webpages looking; but there is nothing. I am like a seashell--I seem to speak, yet I only echo the greater sea.

Dreamlord, what do you think then?

politika

Today was another I-wish-I-didn't-go-to-school day. The prof for PE wasn't there, Bio was dead, as usual, and the only form of relief came from Deutsch; but a headache soon afterwards. After class, I managed to get a copy of the Kule, still on rebel mode; then went to Gateway with Danielle (who was going home to LB for the weekend and was on the way to Cubao too, so we decided to take a side trip to the Gateway food court). Talk about contrasts. I'm not Leftist, but I don't believe in all the admin's reasonings anyway. It is important to hear what everyone has to say first.

Let's just say I'm indifferent about people's ideologies, for the most part. There are no wrong ideologies, anyway; to quote Gandhi, "Christianity is good; it is Christians I do not understand." There are bad eggs on both side of the fence. Like that egg-throwing incident. Those eggs would have been better in somebody's hungry stomach than on a general's pants (even if he, as commander-in-chief of the army, is guilty).

In retrospect, that's what I should have said at the Quill mock interview eons ago. The very frank I-don't-give-a-shit. I'm so tired in believing in things anyway; faith has no reason, and too bad I don't like unreasonable things.

Well, no changing the past now. And what's a story without a sprinkling of regret? There'll be always a what-if question in some parts of somebody's life. I won't really fit in there anyway.

So there...enough for the moment. All my thoughts that have really made sense have run out, and unless I restrain myself, I'll start writing gibberish.

caffeine

I'm downstairs while the cat is still reeling from the effects of licking the last drying drops of coffee from my cup. I finally finished the 2nd job change quest on Tala, but I can't level much yet--I still have to hunt everybody skills. Not that I'm complaining--after all, it's time to give back.

I wish I just went home after Soc Sci earlier--another rally again and so for the next two classes our profs were absent. I have nothing against that--it's just I wish they'd give advance notice so that I won't spend most of the day loitering around the campus.

So currently I'm chatting with my ex-gdm and reading up on the boards. The sad thing about Tala is that it lags too much, even more than Pola at times, so alt+tab isn't possible. And since class isn't relly early tomorrow, well, I will be staying up a bit late.

Was immer.

to-do lists

I wasn't able to post yesterday--either Blogger was down or it was just the dial-up acting like a goddamn primadonna again--so it'd be a bit late to say Happy New Year right now; and the homework pile isn't in a Happy New Year mood either.


So while the cat's pretty much behaved (meaning asleep) right now, I guess I have to start on that Deutsch letter. I'd start it first in English and just translate it into Deutsch--that way, if I run into any trouble, I'd just feed it in the online translator and ta-da! instant sentence. Then just recheck it for grammar errors. The Soc Sci project just needs some pictures to be resized, and the PanPil article just probably needs a second reading. And Ma asked me to get something scanned.

I'll finish them all, I hope. More like, I need to.