I'm typing this as I wait for mom to finish taking a bath.
Dropping two subjects, I taste a bit of failure and release. Sure, the Archeo I'd miss, but not the Chem, since our prof even with his credentials wasn't really a good teacher. Surprisingly mom was okay with it, even joking that life in UP wasn't complete without dropping/failing. And yes I think she's right--we do learn the most important things in life outside the classroom, and in this case, in leaving the classroom. To learn that we'd all fail once in a while, but we have to move on smiling though deep inside you feel really horrible.
So I ended up looking for some short courses (since I would end up with just one class on Tuesdays and Fridays, and mom didn't want that) and I'll probably take one on Photoshop at Informatics, something I really wanted to do for so long but always kept on being railroaded by other more pressing stuff like advance classes and such. And there's the issue of my other subjects on Thursday as well.
Oh well. There's a time for everything, and everything a time.
29.8.07
27.8.07
of casts and napkins--a girlish rant
My cast got yanked off earlier after tempers flew--apparently those clinic staff didn't list my appointment, and my ortho who was currently down with the flu had to drive from Bulacan to Megamall just to remove it since we're already there, which shows how good as a doctor he really is. And yes that was a very long run-on sentence, but since I'm rushing I'm going into my "hell with grammar" mode again. With that cast off, all I have to contend with is 2 weeks' worth of theraphy (one on Wednesday again, which again removes my play/work time, and means that I'll be back to almost sleepless nights again).
And to contend with my period which conveniently decided to start today, too. x_x Since earlier my foot was still in the cast, after a quick shower, I was about to dress up when I noticed (since I was still unable to walk that morning and I was just in a towel) that there were no napkins around. My grandmother, of course, didn't have any, and my mom and aunt were both upstairs.
So I had no choice but to bloody yell my heart out for either my mom or aunt, and to my utter frustration, my mom was still taking a bath and my aunt was just dressing up.
My grandmother came, though, and my grandfather. But since my grandmother wasn't able to climb the stairs (well according to her, but she's well enough), my grandfather asked me what I needed upstairs. And I told him I needed a napkin, forgetting the facts that a) Some men still don't know what those are for and b) My grandfather was born before those were invented, which further complicates the issue. So all I get is a blank stare.
Thank goodness our maid, Ate Mely, comes to the rescue, and she was able to procure not just one but two napkins from my aunt before I had to yell again for napkins and shatter the imagined peace of the neighborhood.
So all's well that end's well, for now. The real battle begins tomorrow, when the deluge of schoolwork drowns me--and I can barely swim.
And to contend with my period which conveniently decided to start today, too. x_x Since earlier my foot was still in the cast, after a quick shower, I was about to dress up when I noticed (since I was still unable to walk that morning and I was just in a towel) that there were no napkins around. My grandmother, of course, didn't have any, and my mom and aunt were both upstairs.
So I had no choice but to bloody yell my heart out for either my mom or aunt, and to my utter frustration, my mom was still taking a bath and my aunt was just dressing up.
My grandmother came, though, and my grandfather. But since my grandmother wasn't able to climb the stairs (well according to her, but she's well enough), my grandfather asked me what I needed upstairs. And I told him I needed a napkin, forgetting the facts that a) Some men still don't know what those are for and b) My grandfather was born before those were invented, which further complicates the issue. So all I get is a blank stare.
Thank goodness our maid, Ate Mely, comes to the rescue, and she was able to procure not just one but two napkins from my aunt before I had to yell again for napkins and shatter the imagined peace of the neighborhood.
So all's well that end's well, for now. The real battle begins tomorrow, when the deluge of schoolwork drowns me--and I can barely swim.
25.8.07
the simpsons and online gaming
Marge: Wow Moe, you're a troll!
Moe: What? No! My character's supposed to look like me! Why does everyone keep thinking I'm a troll!?
LOL.
24.8.07
sein
I've finally finished his layout--one of the hardest job that I had to do, owing to the fact that the screenies he sent were a bit small. I'll upload it tom., and I hope he likes it.
the isle and the mariner
You discover me one night
emmeshed in white cotton seas
a lone isle.
You, trusting the stars
intuitively and foolishly
like a Mariner of old.
First you chart my every contour,
every ridge, cliff, overhang
Your hands swiftly yet firmly
mapping every nook and cranny.
Then you disembark
and scale my peaks
discovering treasures I've once so hidden
Now, I offer out to you.
As you grow weary
you pitch camp
and sleep soundlessly
upon my bosom.
And though you may leave
at the crack of dawn
to seek out other lone isles
with the stars as your guides
I know you'll return to me
home
a lone isle in these seas of cotton.
emmeshed in white cotton seas
a lone isle.
You, trusting the stars
intuitively and foolishly
like a Mariner of old.
First you chart my every contour,
every ridge, cliff, overhang
Your hands swiftly yet firmly
mapping every nook and cranny.
Then you disembark
and scale my peaks
discovering treasures I've once so hidden
Now, I offer out to you.
As you grow weary
you pitch camp
and sleep soundlessly
upon my bosom.
And though you may leave
at the crack of dawn
to seek out other lone isles
with the stars as your guides
I know you'll return to me
home
a lone isle in these seas of cotton.
23.8.07
layout, layout, layout
Because of this layout (which surprisingly many found to be, err, cute) I've accepted requests to make backgrounds for Blogger and well also Friendster (he asked me to). Not entirely layouts, since I'm not that good at coding (I only know basic HTML and CSS) and there's the issue of hosting as well. I've already finished one for smoking engine, but I'll have to wait for later to try it out. The sad thing is I don't know if I'll have the time to finish the requests. Specially for his Friendster background, since he'll only mail it on Saturday.
I'll have to make time for it then. :)
I'll have to make time for it then. :)
22.8.07
on the wings of a dream
Finally finished a new background for this blog--one of the easiest I've done, since it didin't involve me rushing around the whole expanse of cyberspace looking for pics. The main pic is just my character's screenie from PW-Ph (the same one I sent him), the uncial font from Lord Kyl's Medieval and Fantasy Fonts and all others just the defaults from Photoshop CS. And the quote thingy is related to my last post.
17.8.07
online/fantasy/on life
I'm sitting here, alone, with only my old kimono for company. Good thing the connection's pretty stable today, or I'd be a bit annoyed again; the dog's asleep, and I can't really relate to my grandfather and grandmother's conversations.
Another petty argument with mom last night--she threatened to rescind all my gaming priviledges, which of course I (or the gamer side of me) didn't want to happen. Like all other petty arguments with mothers, you kiss and make up after around 5 minutes (the worst was only a day). You can't blame mothers either, you know they love you but they just don't seem to understand the life of a gamer (or even a one-part gamer like I am).
They'll never understand that for a gamer, the online life is as important as the real life, and without one, there wouldn't be the other. It was never just a mirror, for mirrors just reflect, but they do not cause change on either the real or the reflected side.
Virtual worlds, I believe, is like the whole genre of fantasy in the arts: it's our dreams as kids, spilling over into the real world. It's the nearest thing that our dreams can come to a concrete form, our dreams of worlds where we could be justice and treachery, where we can become both ruler and pauper, with only one phrase uttered online/in-game and one click of the mouse.
If once we had authors and artists, now we have game developers. If once we saw ourselves in the shoes of a wizard slaying dragons or a elven warriors, now we are the wizards and the warriors.
Online is also the unification of our shared myths and legends--there's the concept in lit (I can't remember the exact term right now) that some myths are common in many cultures, such as the Great Flood and that of the Celestial Maiden. Pick any one game, and you'd see echoes of myths and legends mixing into one cohesive mix--if not in the storyline, in the design of the surroundings. Take Ragnarok Online for example--you have everything from Asian (Payon) to Western (Prontera) and even Middle Eastern (Morroc).
Sometimes we can't avoid the negative sides of our selves spilling over into these virtual worlds, too. We have people metamorphing into tyrants, their dreams of power overriding the dreams of others. We've had people who've dreamed of becoming strong irl becoming strong in-game, and exact revenge over those who they've think have oppressed them, including many innocents along the way, not realizing that it was them merely oppressing themselves with hate.
But since online is a spill-over of our offline lives, we can't avoid the reverse, too. We've heard of friendships and loves budding in the evergreen forests of any given online game and blossoming irl (or sometimes broken hearts as well, like in the case of the chixilogs). There's also the issue on RMT, where the rich irl are also the rich in-game. We've had people, wishing to be rulers, but being unable to do so because of society and the system irl, giving up their lives offline because they've found fulfillment in-game.
This is what always shows in the media--the sordid stories of people giving up their real lives just to play.
Yet we forget to ask, why do they do forsake their offline lives? Maybe because they've found a voice online; when offline they aren't heard. Maybe because they have the power in-game, and not irl.
And maybe, to bring them back, it's time to hear them and help each other build our dreamworlds irl too.
This post is written for the first week of the gmtristan.com Group Writing Project. Want to join? Clicky here.
Another petty argument with mom last night--she threatened to rescind all my gaming priviledges, which of course I (or the gamer side of me) didn't want to happen. Like all other petty arguments with mothers, you kiss and make up after around 5 minutes (the worst was only a day). You can't blame mothers either, you know they love you but they just don't seem to understand the life of a gamer (or even a one-part gamer like I am).
They'll never understand that for a gamer, the online life is as important as the real life, and without one, there wouldn't be the other. It was never just a mirror, for mirrors just reflect, but they do not cause change on either the real or the reflected side.
Virtual worlds, I believe, is like the whole genre of fantasy in the arts: it's our dreams as kids, spilling over into the real world. It's the nearest thing that our dreams can come to a concrete form, our dreams of worlds where we could be justice and treachery, where we can become both ruler and pauper, with only one phrase uttered online/in-game and one click of the mouse.
If once we had authors and artists, now we have game developers. If once we saw ourselves in the shoes of a wizard slaying dragons or a elven warriors, now we are the wizards and the warriors.
Online is also the unification of our shared myths and legends--there's the concept in lit (I can't remember the exact term right now) that some myths are common in many cultures, such as the Great Flood and that of the Celestial Maiden. Pick any one game, and you'd see echoes of myths and legends mixing into one cohesive mix--if not in the storyline, in the design of the surroundings. Take Ragnarok Online for example--you have everything from Asian (Payon) to Western (Prontera) and even Middle Eastern (Morroc).
Sometimes we can't avoid the negative sides of our selves spilling over into these virtual worlds, too. We have people metamorphing into tyrants, their dreams of power overriding the dreams of others. We've had people who've dreamed of becoming strong irl becoming strong in-game, and exact revenge over those who they've think have oppressed them, including many innocents along the way, not realizing that it was them merely oppressing themselves with hate.
But since online is a spill-over of our offline lives, we can't avoid the reverse, too. We've heard of friendships and loves budding in the evergreen forests of any given online game and blossoming irl (or sometimes broken hearts as well, like in the case of the chixilogs). There's also the issue on RMT, where the rich irl are also the rich in-game. We've had people, wishing to be rulers, but being unable to do so because of society and the system irl, giving up their lives offline because they've found fulfillment in-game.
This is what always shows in the media--the sordid stories of people giving up their real lives just to play.
Yet we forget to ask, why do they do forsake their offline lives? Maybe because they've found a voice online; when offline they aren't heard. Maybe because they have the power in-game, and not irl.
And maybe, to bring them back, it's time to hear them and help each other build our dreamworlds irl too.
This post is written for the first week of the gmtristan.com Group Writing Project. Want to join? Clicky here.
9.8.07
little spats
Had a little spat with mom again last night. All about my gaming again, and how I'm neglecting my studies again. For the record, I'm not--I didn't purposely put my foot in a damn cast on purpose. And my profs haven't emailed anything for me to do yet, so I'm pretty much clueless about what's happening in all of my classes right now.
And on me staying on the PC so long? Doesn't she realize that I talk to everybody in YM now? So what if Mark's the only one calling on the phone? The only reason why I'm not calling all my irl friends is that a) YM is cheaper because b) they're scattered all across the country already. If I really get pissed off I'll call them all on long distance and have a phone call marathon. While she's at it, I'll ask for three-way.
Sorry mom, I still love you, but you'll never understand. And I won't understand your side either. Can't we just live in cold tolerance?
I'll post more on this prolly later or never--either I'll type from what I jotted down on another notebook or start from scratch. Well whatever.
And on me staying on the PC so long? Doesn't she realize that I talk to everybody in YM now? So what if Mark's the only one calling on the phone? The only reason why I'm not calling all my irl friends is that a) YM is cheaper because b) they're scattered all across the country already. If I really get pissed off I'll call them all on long distance and have a phone call marathon. While she's at it, I'll ask for three-way.
Sorry mom, I still love you, but you'll never understand. And I won't understand your side either. Can't we just live in cold tolerance?
I'll post more on this prolly later or never--either I'll type from what I jotted down on another notebook or start from scratch. Well whatever.
6.8.07
cast
Stuck at home again for at least two weeks.
It all started with the PW Consumer Launch last Saturday. It was fun--well except that I tripped over that tire-obstacle thing in the Multi-terrain battle thing. Because of my (already wounded) pride, I refused first aid, and well basically ignored the pain. It was afternoon when that happened, and well I went home around 8, expecting the pain to subside the next morning with a little rest. After all, I had a field trip the next day.
Well I can't even move my foot yesterday, so I had to forego the field trip, and ended up having my foot cast in plaster of paris. Then returned earlier to the clinic to had the cast changed to a lighter but more expensive fiberglass one.
So no class for me again for at least two weeks. Oh well.
It all started with the PW Consumer Launch last Saturday. It was fun--well except that I tripped over that tire-obstacle thing in the Multi-terrain battle thing. Because of my (already wounded) pride, I refused first aid, and well basically ignored the pain. It was afternoon when that happened, and well I went home around 8, expecting the pain to subside the next morning with a little rest. After all, I had a field trip the next day.
Well I can't even move my foot yesterday, so I had to forego the field trip, and ended up having my foot cast in plaster of paris. Then returned earlier to the clinic to had the cast changed to a lighter but more expensive fiberglass one.
So no class for me again for at least two weeks. Oh well.
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